Ugh. Aka, best laid plans…

So, today went NOTHING as planned. My childcare for my trip to Dix fell through, so I canceled all my appointments. And now I’m on pins and needles because the childcare issue is still kind of iffy through the weekend. EEP. *cue anxiety* I just really, really hope all this freaking out is for naught and my client’s baby waits until next week. That would be great. Because that’s what being a doula is all about. HA. I just really hate scrambling and last minute help from friends. Even though that’s what friends are supposed to be for. Just, ugh, I so totally do not wanna put anyone out and have them be annoyed with me forevermore. That would be awful. Damn insecurities.
Sooooo, maybe focus on the good parts of the day, NOT the parts where I was reading a book or mindlessly fretting and ADHDing and not adjusting for broken plans and getting unplanned things done…those were the yucky parts. The good parts are where I:
-made the bed
-washed and dried and put away 2 loads of laundry
-unloaded the dishwasher
-kept the kitchen decently clean
-bought teacher appreciation gifts
Not too completely shabby, I guess.
Tomorrow I need to:
-finish lining up backup childcare
-complete Old Navy order
-sweep kitchen floor
-clean the bathroom
-collect laundry
Let’s hope I can get to it. I’m terrified my client will go into labor. Blaaaaah. So not a fan of this level of anxiety. This particular anxiety wasn’t introduced until today, but my dreams tell me my stress has been building. Both of the last two nights have included dreams involving being shoved around by large animals (think cows, bison) and unable to do a thing about it. Maybe I’ll watch some ASMR and hope that helps me sleep more peacefully.


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